So I've been doing some thinking....

As I sat outside tonight admiring the moon(something I have been known to do often) After I got off or work. (which was tedious at best tonight) I got a message from a long time friend who I don't always get to talk to on a regular basis. We did our quick catching up and the fact that my birthday is coming up came up...(ok aside from my usual WOO HOO it's nearly my birthday feelings since we all know I love celebrating my birthday in big ways..Hey what can I say it's my semi-special day to celebrate ME) It has become slightly noticable to me that I will be turning 27 this year. I am no longer in my early 20s and on the backside of the mid-20s.

It got me to thinking about all the years that have come and gone in my life. (if you haven't noticed I mark my life by significant days ie birthdays, new years etc...) Where I was on my past birthdays or who I was with stick in my mind. In a odd way there has nearly always been big things going on in my life around the time to celebrate the day of my birth. I got my divorce in the same week as my birthday some years ago. (now that's one birthday I will never forget) But I digress, so I started thinking about what all has surrounded my birthdays in the years passed. I have had some super amazing birthdays. Not by what I received but by who I had spent the day with. I have always had amazing friends to share my birthday with. This year they are spread out too far to get to spend the day with them. One is in Colorado,one in Kentucky, another in Maine, and another in South Carolina and 2 right here in the state of Florida but still highly unlikely that I will be able to see them. I have always celebrated my birthdays with my friends and getting to spend the day with them being silly or just having a really good time together..

Once again I digress, looking way back at my 18th birthday. I look back at who I was then and where at that time I thought I would be when my late 20s came. I realize that at 18 you have no idea what life is really like and that you can't expect to be exactly who you thought you would be now at that age. But there are somethings I certainly thought I would be doing or have already done. Now some of those things I have done but failed miserably at. And some others I try to do every day. And others I am no where near. Is it logical to wish you were where you thought you would be? Or more realistic to see that you may not be where you wanted to be but you have had the chance to make that place evolve as you have gotten older? Is where I am better than where I thought I wanted to be because I have had to sacrifice to get here. Had to learn and earn my way here. Or have I lost the track that I had set for myself. Every journey in life you will have slight detours, you can't go though life without them but have I veered off on one of those detours too far? So tonight I'm trying to figure out if in the end I will be where I ultimately wanted to be regardless of how I get there....